Help 2 – crotchgear

I have a post-order question...

I ordered a week ago and never received an order confirmation? Gee whiz, is this a scam? 
A: Perhaps the only reason why you did not receive an order confirmation from us: you made a typographical error on your email address when you ordered and didn't realize it. After each order, our storefront server automatically generates an order confirmation email and instantly sends it to the customer's email address supplied in the order. When a typo is made on an email address, it usually results in the order confirmation being sent to an email address that does not exist and therefore "bounces". When this happens, we get an email with a "bounce" notification that says "we could not send the order confirmation to" Now, since this customer's email address could be 'JennHottie41221', 'JennHottie41222', or any other combination of letters and numbers for that matter, we wait until they contact us to resend them their order confirmation. So, long story short, if you have not received your order confirmation, contact us and we will resend it to you.

I accidentally gave y'all the wrong shipping address. Is it too late to fix it?
A: That will depend. If you made any mistake during ordering including (but not limited to): wrong size, wrong name, wrong shipping address, etc., please contact us IMMEDIATELY so that we can try to correct the error before shipping out your order. We will not be held liable for any careless mistakes made by the customer that lead to order delays and reshipping fees.

I need a refund from you guys. Can you mail it to me in the physical form of a check, cash, money order, etc.?
A: The short answer: no. The long answer: To keep our overhead costs minimal, we only offer refunds through our web store provider at this time. The upside to doing it this way is that your refund will show up WAY QUICKER than if we send you the funds in physical form. Although your refund wont show up immediately, it will show up on your next billing cycle statement. Thanks for understanding.

My mail person always delivers important packages to my doorstep and I think my order was stolen. Will you guys send me a replacement?
A: No, and here is why. Once an order leaves our facility the liability of loss shifts to USPS. If USPS loses a package mid-route, they will reimburse us to send replacement products. If a package is marked as "delivered" in the USPS system, it then becomes the responsibility of the home owner or apartment complex to make sure the package is received safe and sound. The reason why many apartment complexes hold packages for their residents is to avoid stolen parcels. Therefore, we cannot be held responsible for any orders not received by a customer after the tracking status is marked as "delivered". If you live in an apartment complex and are worried that your order might get stolen, please contact a manager from your apartment complex and ask them to make an effort to hold the package.

I'm worried that the package my order is sent in will give away what's inside. How discrete is my package?
A: Occasionally, we do receive some concerns about how order packages look when they arrive. Sometimes, it's because the order is a gift and the buyer lives with the recipient. Other times, the package may be sent to a professional office and the word "crotch" pasted all over the bag/box may raise some eyebrows. Regardless of the scenario, our packages are very discretely mailed in a white poly-mailer or USPS flat rate shipping box (depending on order size). Both package styles only disclose the word "crotchgear LLC" very small in the from line of the label. Short of not even including our company name on the postage (we are required to), you wouldn't even know the package came from us.

I went out to play and got dirty. What is the best way to wash my crotchgear?
A: Please see full care instructions for our products right here.  

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